Sunday, April 08, 2012

Back in the Saddle


I found myself lucky enough to have TWO whole days off in a row this holiday weekend. I had plans that changed mid week, finding myself alone. I didn't look at it in a bad way. I was more relieved.

I want to be alone. Since I was 15, I haven't been single more than a month. I have looked to others for my approval. Afraid to like myself. I am growing up to become who I really am and not who someone else wants me to be.

I love exercise. Great Stress reliever AND health benefits too! I told myself when my marriage was ending that I my goal is not to look for ANYONE else, but to exercise more. Focus on my kids, relationship with God, exercise and work.

I have little post-it notes all around my house that say things like "It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are"... and this...

I enjoyed a beautiful 2 mile run first thing Saturday morning, followed by the hour long Yoga session and a 1 hour trail ride on my road bike. Temps for the bike ride were in the high 60's and little wind. It was Terrific!! I had to make the ride only an hour since my bike needs a tune up and my saddle is not used to the sores yet... ha.ha.

I am hoping to sign up for a mud race called the Mud Stash on May 19th at a local ski hill. It looks like so much fun, but I am sad that I won't have a cheering section... That is my current mental block.

My kiddo's joined me that night and we had a great time talking. It felt great to get back on track with them. The feeling of letting your kids down is probably the worst part of a divorce. You hear horror stories about kids acting out but we have been EXTREMELY lucky with our boys. My soon to be ex and I are getting along very well. We are trying to show the kids how to be friends even when feelings have gotten hurt. My Ex is head over heals for a new woman and I couldn't be happier for him. I truly feel better knowing he is happy.

I am kind of picky about my new friends. I don't have a lot down here yet. I am tired of fake people. I get it. I've been there, done that. Fear of rejection, wanting to be included... I am learning to love the silence when I am alone. This past week I had to learn to enjoy it because I was out of minutes on my cell phone and worked so much the last thing I wanted to do was fire off an email to someone. I felt the panic of quietness but was helpless to do anything but deal with it.

Everyday, wait maybe every week, I am finding new things I can like about myself. Slowly, I am growing up to become who I REALLY am...

4 comments:

Jennifer Sanchez said...

I am very grateful to this great spell caster who brought my ex husband back to me. This testimony is a true story and my name is Jennifer Sanchez. When i came in contact with this man was also through a testimony written about him and i have also encountered many testimonies about how he has been helping others with their life. To get back with an ex is one of the most inner most feeling many people would love to experience especially as those memories with our ex always cloud our mind when someone else does some of those things our ex used to do. I was a single parent for almost 6 years and though my ex husband was far away from my kids i still wish someday he will return back to me. This spell doctor i encountered known as Doctor Odunga helped me with my wishes and i am happy to say that i am back with my ex husband and i am very happy sharing the testimony with everyone so that they too can meet this great doctor and solve their problems. I don't know what others might feel about getting their ex back in their life but i always know there is a blessing in disguise with just a single reconnection with an ex. If you want to successfully get back with your ex, visit this website odungaspelltemple.wordpress.com or contact this great spell caster at odungaspelltemple@gmail.com and share an awesome testimony too just like me.

Unknown said...

I am Melissa Krane. I want to write a testimony of a spell caster who helped me. I have been a frustrated woman before i met doctor odunga. I must recommend this spell caster to everyone who needs help because he does his work. I want to appreciate him for the help he gave to me when my daughter was dying sick of epilepsy because she is blood type SS and this makes her get sick easily. When i contacted this spell caster i never knew he was the one to heal my daughter because my problem has been going on since my girl was a baby. I don't know if you reading this can understand my pain but today its a different story. All thanks to Doctor Odunga. This man is easy to contact if you want him to help you with his power, his website is odungaspelltemple.wordpress.com and his personal email is odungaspelltemple@gmail.com

Unknown said...



HOW I GOT CURE FROM HIV WITH HERBAL CONCOCTIONS

I did not believe Its possible that HIV can be cured with herbal concoctions until i came across this man Called SPIRITUALIST DR John. i have been infected with HIV for the past 1and half years, just early this year I keep reading the testimony about this man named SPIRITUALIST DR John . I read that the man is so powerful he had cured different types of diseases, Like

DIABETICS

HERPES

INFERTILITY

LUPUS VIRUS

CANCER and so on...

I kept monitoring posts about him. thereafter i decided to give him a try I contacted him for help and he said he was going to help me get my cure that all i needed to do was to send him the required details to get my treatment started. some days later i got the concoction sent to me. i applied it as it was said by the DR.after three weeks of applying the treatment i went test and it was negative Right now i am absolutely cured of HIV. i could not keep this great testimony to myself that's why i need to post to help others in the same conditions. So beloved make the big move today and contact him lupuscure2016@gmail.com

this Dr is tested and trusted
Add him on whatsapp on +2347064365391 thanks once again Dr john

Jennifer Sanchez said...

The day my husband left me, things appeared bleak, and the atmosphere was heavy with uncertainties. Everything seemed pale

and so I decided to look for help in spell casters who have the capability to bring my ex husband back to me. As envisaged, I went

on the internet and as you too have seen in your search for a reliable spell caster, I saw a lot of testimonies of spell

casters in the recovery of ex husbands and loved ones. Driven by belief in Doctor Odunga, I contacted him and after explaining

things to him, he accepted to face the challenges on ground. He did brilliantly well. My ex husband is back to me with more care

and affection. I will therefore like to take this opportunity to pay tribute to him and share this testimony to enable others in need to

contact him for his selfless service to situations and problems. Commendable, he shows great courage at taking on the daunting

task of finding solutions to practically any given problem. Contact him at odungaspelltemple@gmail.com and I believe he won't

fail you too.